Friday, December 21, 2012

I've had my fun, let's move on to something else now

Some people have a legitimate reason to feel depressed, but not me
and i know you are like..

Im tired of talking to myself when im in the toilet, im afraid if theres a weird unknown face or ghost that may be appeared suddenly
so i guess i should start writing on my blog again. yes, ON the blog
but everytime i start to write, ....

I just wanna say, what had happened wasnt anybody's fault and i dont hate you, but i just, hmmmm  whatttefuck! haha
yes, emo
its just that, oh whoaa. anything can change in a blink of an eye, woo its rare. or maybe in a blink of eyes. i believe in Allah, that everything happens for a reason,but in this case, FOR REASONSSS. alhamdulillah :)

Yeah, when you fall, you get hurt. it can be hard to walk again, or to even stand up again.
but when you fall in love,its different. you may fall too deep and you never want to get out from the shit ass love :) i know you never tried to dig the hole of love and i never wanna put the blame on anyone because it was what Allah's will and power. i dont regret the past, i know you've tried hard, i know you did love me in the past, i could feel it. or even if you were not trying that hard... it has gone, i do understand your situation. 
i was just. sad and shocked in relief
that finally you decided to stop me from getting hurt by your weird attitudes, cold words and responses, ignorance. well, i should never have cared. but i did, and i still fucking care.

Just,look, how everything happened. we went from talking every damn hours to maybe once or twice a day. we went from loving each other to you, who dont love me back. i know i met you for a reason, for all these years i had spent every single piece of my life with you, thinking about you, crying for you, waiting for your call for the entire day and everyday when you were at hostel. i just dont know what the reason is, or maybe not now. without regret, so i will never be able to regret what i didnt do for love so i will never be able to look back and say 'what if' because i always went after what was. i love without regret so i'll live a life with my love one day. phewww hahah

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